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The main-stream concept of being “bisexual” will be intimately drawn to men and women.

The main-stream concept of being “bisexual” will be intimately drawn to men and women.

That I identify as queer if you don’t really know me you may not know.

Folks are frequently astonished whenever I inform them we date ladies, too, because we can “pass” as being directly. We don’t have the stereotypical markers of queerness that many people look out for in queer females: tattoos, quick locks, rainbows and Xena (hey Haydee!), flannel shirt, etc. (trust in me, I attempted the faux hawk thing also it didn’t work with me personally!).

I identify as “femme” and We have and think it’s great. My femme ness does not make me any less queer, radical, or feminist, because i’m working out agency to define exactly exactly what queerness and womanhood look and feel like for me personally. In addition, stereotypes that expect lesbian females become butch, and homosexual guys to be feminine further perpetuate heteronormativity and erase the required distinction between sex identification and orientation that is sexual. A subject for an extended post.

As you are able to imagine, my capacity to “pass” as straight and being regarded as usually feminine give me use of specific privileges (cis and hetero ). Also it makes being queer only a little tricky from time to time, too. We usually find myself fixing individuals once they improperly assume my orientation that is sexual myself in queer spaces, and experiencing protective whenever my sexuality is challenged. Femme invisibility is genuine and I also encounter biphobia and internalized biphobia often. It’s been a journey learning the language and tools to enable myself to explore them.

Being released, for me personally and many more, sex chat rooms is a consistent work each time we meet some body brand new, each and every time some body makes an assumption or concerns my identification, I assess whether i wish to turn out.

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